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Don't judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.


Andrew

This is re posted.


Andrew Keller

Every morning, Larry and I dig into a form or idea that has caught our eye. Our hope is that our chat inspires you to never stop thinking and possibly challenges you in a new way. If you'd like to help support the show, please visit patreon.com slash reposted. Thank you for stopping by. You don't know me, Larry, today's quote is known. It's used a lot. It says don't judge my story by the chapter you walked in on, I think a lot of times people I would, I would guess that a lot of times people attribute this to be like, Don't judge me. But I want to flip it a little bit and be like, put it on myself, because you can't control what other people are going to do. But don't judge other people by what chapter of life they're in. I mean, we've talked multiple times about how you live in San Francisco, I used to live in San Francisco, we knew lots of people with lots of money that have a very shiny life. And you can judge them very easily by what they're doing in that moment. But we really don't know what's going on behind the scenes or what led up to that point. So who do you think don't judge a book by its cover?


Larry

I feel like this, if it's not a bingo square should be it's the waitress analogy you go to when in the old days when we used to go to restaurants, your waitress is really snippy with you grumpy, and you want to be like, Wow, she's gonna get awful service, I'm going to load it. We have no idea what happened in her life that day. We don't know if a kid has cancer, her husband died. Whatever it is, we have no idea on a basis, day to day basis what happened, what someone is going through, unless you're truly in someone's life truly in their life,


Andrew Keller

I think we should take a mental note that we need to do a episode about why you should not use a low tip to be vindictive. I've never been a server. But I think that's a life lesson that a lot of people don't know, I don't know if there's that many people in the world that I know, comprehensively, comprehensively enough what's going on in their lives. Like, I talked to you five days a week. And there's a lot of stuff I don't know that you're doing. And so it's like, just reserve judgment and focus on yourself.


Larry

Yeah, and I think that's the key, like, do you really want to enter into someone's life? Or do you just want to chuck it advice to them? like someone's having a bad day, or whatever it is, and you just want to tell them what to do, as opposed to asking questions like, Hey, what's going on? And I feel like the question part is entering into someone's life. shotgunning advices. Like, peace out? I'm over here.


Andrew Keller

Yeah, I guess as we've been talking about this, I've taken a step back from this quote, and if you just don't judge me, like, I think that's an easier thing to say. Like, it doesn't matter where you are in your life judging other people. When you point the finger at someone, you have four more pointing right back at you.


Larry

Is I asked this question a lot, probably bingo squares, well, are Americans just more judgy than other cultures? Does it because it feels like judging comes easy for us.


Andrew Keller

I think we're more passive aggressive about it. But I mean, when I've traveled other countries, I feel like people are just as judgmental. But they're right out in the open with it. Where they're like, oh, what's your love life? Like, oh, why aren't you married? And they just like, get right in it. And maybe there's less stigma to it by just getting stuff out in the open. I think judging someone being like, oh, Larry, Larry decided to buy Adidas shoes. And like I talked to our intern behind your back, as opposed to like, just being in conversation by like judgment. I kind of associate with a silent judgment or talking behind people's backs, even though that's not necessarily what it is


Larry

the ultimate judgment for me living in San Francisco, maybe you can relate to this is homeless people. You see someone on the street corner, and you're like, Oh, they probably do drugs, or they probably blew all their money. We have no idea about that person's Don't we have no idea? Literally, we have no idea how they ended up on that corner. yet. When I see them, I immediately think, oh, they blew everything. Maybe they didn't have anything to begin with.


Andrew Keller

was interesting. My first thought is self preservation. I see them and I think they're a wild card. And I might like just be on on on defense because they might lash out. Nicole figured out something maybe by accident, but because I'm a straight white large man, I don't think about being attacked that much. But a tactic she learned was when you see someone or you feel threatened, say hello to them and it catches them off guard like someone's less likely to attack you. So anytime she's walking by a homeless encampment, which there are a lot of in Los Angeles. So like hello. And more times than not like she'll get a very friendly response. And so it's like you said, we're judging them on their chapter. We don't know how they got there. But people aren't all crazy. It's just you see the crazy person shouting on the corner and you're like, well, that person's homeless. So all homeless people are crazy. And that's not necessarily the case.


Larry

And I love that idea of Hello, is basically just acknowledging, hey, you're a human being. And I think a lot of times when we get around people who want to judge them, but listen, we're all, for lack of a better term sinful people, we all have mistakes, we love good parts. And when we're judging someone, we're just talking about their bad parts at that particular point. But I'm sure there's good parts. So it's back to this idea of you never know where someone is in their life and which chapter they're at, to just start shotgunning judgment. I think


Andrew Keller

the judgment also puts them on a different level than you whether it's lower or higher, saying, well, that person made mistakes. And that makes me feel better, because I did not make those mistakes. Or On the flip side, that guy or that lady just got a new job or started a new company or whatever, they bought a new house, and I'm jealous of that, and it puts them above you and puts you lower, and can create more animosity, I think the goal should be to try to figure out how we're all simple people, and we're all on the same plane. And that would promote happiness in your own life.


Larry

I just came up with this, but like, what person is reading the book, The firm? And like, in the fifth chapter goes like, Wow, what a great life. He has a beautiful house, a great paying job, kids, the whole dog. Like you got to get to the end of the book to realize all that he went through and I feel like soft at times, we don't realize people on this journey. That's not ending at the moment. You're running into them.


Andrew Keller

Yeah, and I think in the past 1020 years, the with the advent of social media, and just information coming more readily available. public figures, we're learning their lives are not that nice, like, back in the day. It's like, well, oh, Frank Sinatra. He's got it all dialed in. He's taping hundreds to everyone. Potentially, he's killing people. We don't know that's coming out more later. But like, it's not that enviable to be a celebrity now, because things are a lot more messy than you think. And so, yeah, just focus on yourself.


Larry

And I say, as a personal reflection, I feel like I'm gonna have a better compassionate view of people in their journey. As I leave the closet today. really, truly. I feel like this is something I've thought about, but I'm gonna have more compassion today. Thank you, Andrew.


Andrew Keller

You're welcome. I genuinely never know when you're about to make a joke or not. I thought that was going a different direction, but it was heartfelt. Now,


Larry

you changed my life today. Thank you.


Andrew Keller

Well, if you want Larry to leave you a voicemail compliment, please reach out. You can find us at re posted podcast on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. I'm Andrew Keller for Woodstock 99 saying thanks for stopping by.




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